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You know when they say “never give up on your dreams”? It’s such a throwaway statement said mostly by overachievers—those who enjoy and work on it daily with minimal consequence.
What I realize now is that the idea of “giving up” is the unsung hero of that phrase. By that I mean I feel like giving up most of the time, and it sucks. It’s like being sucked into a void of non-value and feeling you’ve wasted your time so why bother anymore, right? In the end, that thing you enjoy but feel insecure about just stops and gets forgotten.
I don’t know where I’m going with this post anymore. The point is that I feel great about this piece after feeling (and being raised by the concept of) there’s no future in art. I mean I still am not earning from this (hire me? Lol) but damn have I improved. And that’s what turned giving up to making me feel wow I can do this??
I meannnnnn imposter syndrome is still hovering behind me thinking I will never make it because I suuck but compared to my previous stuff? This is like a huge leap and I’m proud.
